STRATEGY EATS <br> CROQUET FOR <br> BREAKFAST

The launch of our 2021 strategy and 2025 vision, and the Bec Scully Memorial Cup.

All that stands between Andrew (EM’s Head of Brand) and victory is Jen (EM’s CEO). Literally — Jen’s croquet ball lies directly between Andrew’s ball and the final hoop he needs to take to claim victory. 

He knows what he needs to do. The rest of the EM team knows too. A chant of “jump it, jump it” builds slowly and raises to a crescendo that carries over the storm building above the Burleigh Heads Palm Beach Croquet Club. 

Andrew drops into a crouch, a confronting manoeuvre in his too-tight white Ruggers, sights along the wooden mallet pockmarked with the scars of countless battles, steps up to the ball, and in a decision that must surely cause him to wake in cold sweats — attempts a passing shot.

Strategy. Some people say culture eats it for breakfast. These people would clearly be terrible at croquet.   

At Everyday Massive, we’re big believers in strategy (though not to the exclusion of culture). And so following the team launch of our 2021 strategy and 2025 vision, we donned our croquet whites and took to the courts for the 2nd Annual Bec Scully Memorial Cup in celebration of the competitive spirit of a friend and teammate lost far too soon.   

“Why croquet?” you may ask. To which I would respond: “why not?” What better judge of character is there than the Queen of Games — the recreation of royalty? 

Some sports encourage effort and participation. Others require teamwork and collaboration. Most demand a degree of sportsmanship and respect for one’s opponent.

Croquet is none of these sports.

No, croquet is a vicious game of individual ruthlessness and spite. Victory involves bloody-minded strategy and merciless execution — making it the ideal social experiment to see what a high-performing, yet unfailingly nice group of people are capable of under the guise of friendly competition. 

The day certainly had it all. From big seeds (Dave K, Teus and Nic) falling early, to career advancement tactics (a suspect shot from Dave S allowing yours truly to take down Teus and claim a spot in the finals), to Narelle winning the loser’s round to hoist the wooden spoon. 

Will Andrew bounce back from defeat and reclaim the cup next year? Will Teus seek revenge for Dave’s treachery? Will Tim finally play as big a game as he talks? And will Nads finally work out the precise Pimms-to-performance ratio?

More importantly: is it possible to unsee the blinding expanse of my thighs? 

Unfortunately, I suspect it is not.

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WINNER — Jen
RUNNER UP — Andrew

WOODEN SPOON — Narelle

GAME DAY —

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All Images by Inteus Burton.